Yoga has this amazing way of bringing me back into my body.
I spent about 2 hours this morning dedicated to a deeply nourishing womb yoga practice.
What I didn’t anticipate… and what I feel that MANY people who practice yoga do not always anticipate, is the release of long-held emotions.
Crying on the mat has become a somewhat common place for me. As I have grown into the person I am I can easily start to recognize when I get disconnected from my self and become too outwardly focused.
My exercise of choice used to be running. I LOVED running for many reasons of course; however, I have found that running and other forms of exercise do not always bring me home to myself in quite the same way.
Often times when I am doing other forms of exercise, I find that they are beneficial in helping me to release pent up energy… and being a more fiery individual, I certainly need that from time to time… but it does not require me to turn inward for healing in quite the same way.
Yoga brings a different level of awareness into my being… I will say that I cry most often during more intense yoga practices and usually during savasana.
These past couple of days have been slightly different for me as my practice has shifted to address my healing. (See Opening Up to understand why).
This practice of womb yoga has brought me into the center of my creation… and along with it, this deep awareness of how sacred my body is and all of the various ways I have mistreated it throughout my life. These past couple of days I have been having dialogue with my womb… letting her speak to me and express her anger, frustration, sadness and healing. I have listened with compassion and a sense of awareness around our abilities as humans to override that still small voice that can sometimes turn into a scream.
She has been screaming and vying for my attention.
I do not blame myself for this nor do I hold myself in contempt around it. I let her speak and I understand that I have always done my best with the tools I have had at that time.
And I love her through the pain. I love her through the sadness. I love her through it all.
I understand why some people claim to not like yoga. I understand why some people cannot or do not have the space within to be able to see themselves more clearly. Healing and self love is not always pretty and we may not always be met with the best feelings when new levels of awareness and clarity come in.
But I will say that I am happy to know her better in this space of healing.
I am happy to know myself better as well and though I understand that just like the rose, there are always more layers to discover, I find that am open to the sweetness that comes from exploring new levels of myself.
To me, yoga brings me home to myself… it is a journey of self discovery and deeper love within.
Being able to feel my feelings in a safe and unguarded way has been tremendously healing for me. It’s not just about fancy poses… for me, its about the process of remembering when I forget.
Soon I hope to be able to offer one-to-one womb yoga guidance for other women. I feel that this level of connection to ourselves and to each other is something that is needed within this world.
We are ALL in this together, but our healing always starts within.
Together we heal…